Nowadays, fifty percent of all children born to married parents will deal with divorce before they are 18. Forty-three percent of children grow up without fathers.
In modern day America, it is no longer considered taboo to be living in a house with a single parent. Most days, divorce seems like the answer to a marriage falling apart, but with marriages involving children, it may affect the kids more than the parents.
High school dropout rates are twice as high with kids from broken homes than kids with families still together. Studies also show that kids with divorced parents have lower test scores than kids with parents who are still married.
The news of divorce can be a shock. Some kids may not be able to handle change as well as others. And it depends on how the parents communicate it with the kids and with each other.
It can also be overwhelming on the kids because they may feel the need to fix their parents relationship and that can become their new priority. They lose the balance of school and home life, and home life can become more important.
The pressures of divorce (picking sides, listening to fights, and negative comments about the other parent) could create psychological problems for the kids. Anxiety, depression, speech defects, and stress are all common occurrences when it comes to divorce. These symptoms distract kids from their schooling, making it more difficult to focus on school work.
Even with divorced parents, the fighting can still go on and even get worse. The constant yelling over the phone and can send kids into a downward spiral emotionally.
“With divorced parents, you’re kind of constantly worrying about it. It takes time out of your day. And having siblings living somewhere else is hard because you miss them.” says Junior, Colby Pyatt.
Most kids with a parent who isn’t around often feel like no one will stay in there life or feel their parent doesn’t want them. It’s a thought that never leaves their mind. During the school year, when students with divorced parent have piles of homework, it becomes hard to focus on school with negative thoughts circling your mind.
Maya Falcon, the social and emotional counselor at SJHHS, states “Not all divorces are negative. It depends on the adults. Parents shouldn’t involve the kids and should communicate with each other instead communicating through the kids. Parents can overcome the negativity to create less stress for the kids.”
When kids become the messenger, they are subjected to negative comments, which can cause kids to feel conflicted about each parent.
With divorced parents, communication is key. When parents communicate in positive way, it can result in a healthy relationship between the parents, the kids, and abolish stress in school.
Angole be Deogratias • Feb 9, 2020 at 11:02 AM
Oh, you have done a great job, thanks for that, but you know sometimes, parents who are in the process of divorce, I have think they become psychologically mad up to the extent of doing even nasty deeds, saying hurtful words among others, and with all that is said and done with the notice of the children, they cannot forget them, so I think that, the parents and the children should be nearer to the Church leaders, family counselors and trusted people with developmental ideas. With these, the families will with stand the test of the time, thanks.